An Adult's Happiness Is Quiet (400,000 Copies Sold Special Recover)

Author Taesu · Publisher Page2Books · Publication Date 2024-11-04 · ISBN 9791169851053

About the Book

"We are unnecessarily unhappy and overly complicated in our happiness."
The wisest way to find happiness even in a quiet life.

Would you believe that happiness isn't something you can only get by being happy? Many people misunderstand happiness as something only those who are better off than them possess. They think it exists in popular photo spots, in restaurants with long lines, in expensive items, or in grand things that others would envy. But the easiest way to be happy doesn't involve "happiness." As someone once said, "not having anything on your mind when you lie down to sleep" is happiness itself, and we can be sufficiently happy just by "not being unhappy."
In "An Adult's Happiness is Quiet," author Taesu points out precisely the aspect we've missed. That surprisingly, people can be happy even without happiness. That "even without hope, we can still live tomorrow without despair, and that's enough to be happy." Readers who first read this manuscript also found enlightenment in the same idea.
Just as comfort becomes preferable to thrill as we age, the happiness we should pursue in life is closer to the everyday than to the extraordinary. We deeply feel that a life without major incidents or pain, a life free from unhappiness, is far more reliably happy than one constantly swirling with emotions, oscillating between good and bad.
This book is the culmination of the author's feelings and reflections over the past two years on the easiest and wisest ways to be happy. It's not about finding happiness, but about building a solid defense against unhappiness. So, if you want to escape a life that is unnecessarily unhappy and complicated in its happiness, and instead want to reliably break free from unhappiness and become simply happy, open this book. Your mind will feel much more at ease.

"The hardest thing in the world isn't success, it's contentment."
The easiest happiness for those who always look towards the highest places.

While writing "An Adult's Happiness is Quiet" over two years, author Taesu deeply contemplated happiness and a good life. He then wrote this book with the hope that readers would find a life "full of moments that can be looked back on with a smile, even if there aren't too many highlights." In his unique style, Taesu discussed happiness from a realistic perspective, neither overly hopeful nor overly pessimistic.
Chapter 1, "Kindness Comes from Physical Strength," reminds us how physical health connects to mental well-being, comforting readers with its characteristic honesty and gentle warmth. It reassures us that we are a little better than we think and that simply having lived this far without running away proves we possess great strength.
Chapter 2, "Sleeping Well is Also a Skill," offers practical solutions to those whose minds and hearts are as cluttered with thoughts as the author's. The author, who doesn't just offer vaguely good advice, acknowledges that life can still fail even when you've done your best. He presents new alternatives, suggesting to focus on your physical sensations when sleep eludes you. This is a realistic comfort that resonates far more than mere beautifully written words designed to soothe the mind.
Chapter 3, "I'd Rather Live as a Happy Fool Than a Smart Depressive," expresses wit about observing reality. It explains that some disadvantages can be turned into strengths, and that wanting to do too well can ironically prevent you from starting anything at all. The author shares fresh wisdom gained from various life experiences, conveying it in his unique style that truly hits home.
Finally, Chapter 4, "An Adult's Happiness is Quiet," reiterates the author's philosophy on happiness. It emphasizes the most crucial message: that sometimes silent comfort soothes us more, and that happiness can be found more easily in quiet places than in crowded hot spots that others might envy.
After finishing "An Adult's Happiness is Quiet" and closing the last page, you will naturally feel it. The truth that "the hardest thing in the world isn't success, it's contentment." The truth that you shouldn't focus on what you don't have, and therefore shouldn't always look only at the highest places. Just as the author's grandmother once shared a life insight, there are already many beautiful moments and happiness scattered throughout your life. Let's gain the strength and wisdom to discover them from this book, "An Adult's Happiness is Quiet."

From the Book

Just live as you are now. Live that way, but on days when you’re so tired you can’t even take responsibility for your emotions, on days when your mind is filled with the emotions of others, about to explode. Let’s deliberately escape to a space where only you exist. In that quiet space, give yourself a chance to say this to yourself:
“I’m not okay.” Sometimes, let’s allow ourselves the same sensitivity we give to others.
If giving up becomes a habit, you’ll give up even on things you don’t have to give up on. Yourself.
_ From "Sensitive People Experience Burnout More Often," p. 26

"You don't know how remarkable it is not to run away from life.
Commuting daily from a station without a seat, and giving up a hard-won seat to an elderly woman. Wiping off the sticky spit from your boss every day as if new, getting up, brushing it off, and turning on your monitor without being lazy, opening the shop door wearing safety shoes – you don't know how extraordinary such a life actually is.
I cheer for you, who, even after losing the meaning of life, even when your self-esteem crumbles at someone else's success, still bravely gets up and returns to your place.
Not running away is also a skill. You, who honestly faces this cursed life, are also truly amazing."
_ From "Not Running Away Is Also a Skill," pp. 43-44

In an era overflowing with despair, we need to believe more in the power of luck. We must accept the obvious truth that even with the best choices and efforts, undesirable outcomes can occur. Failure is not entirely yours. You should be more generous in telling yourself, who did your best, and your loved ones, "It's not your fault."
Not as an excuse to do nothing, but to gain the courage to restart and not give up on life.
_ From "Life Can Fail Even When You Do Your Best," pp. 90-91

There are people in the world who know the wrong answers so well that they can get closer to the right answers. People who are so constantly unhappy, failed, sad, and depressed that, conversely, they know well how to live otherwise. I believe that is the power of negativity. You can build positivity even with negativity. Just as knowing the wrong answers well can help you find the right ones.
Going back to the beginning, I said I wanted to die, but that wasn't true. I just didn't want to live like this. It just took too long to find the positivity to break through my mind, which was clumped together with negativity. This is what I call rational positivity.
You can create positivity even from negativity. Because you are unhappy, you can explain what happiness is better. So, now I want to describe myself like this: "I'm not negative. I'm a rationally positive person."
_ From "I Don't Want to Die; I Just Don't Want to Live Like This," pp. 112-113

These days, even when I have a monumental failure, I just let myself laugh. I don't set a proper duration for unhappiness and don't bother to mend the cracks where happiness might leak out. Occasionally, I get a stern warning like, "Is this really the time for you to be doing this?" But what can I do?
I'm so annoyed by failing that I can't even laugh?
I'm simply ready to live my next life. Failure is sad, but I'll end it today. That's the signal I send to unhappiness with my laughter.
I will now laugh and live the next.
I failed today, but tomorrow I will laugh and start anew.
_ From "The Depth of Unhappiness Does Not Prove Desperation," p. 148

People sometimes need silent comfort.
There are times, many times, when a deep nod understanding your pain, and eye contact truly empathizing with your words, are far more urgent than a few harsh words of cold comfort. No, many times.
I now want to comfort my people that way.
Not with an irresponsible "Live," but by wanting to create a day worth living, together.
_ From "Sometimes Silent Comfort Comforts Me More," pp. 225-226

An adult's happiness is quiet. It's closer to relief than thrill, more everyday than special. My current life is happy because I can work without trouble, talk to my family without pain, and live another day without despair, even if there's no hope. Someone might ask if happiness can be found even in such a quiet life, but of course.
Because quietness isn't a state of having nothing to laugh about, but a state of having nothing to cry about. It's not a day without joy, but a day without trouble.
These quiet days that pass without incident
Are not blanks in our lives, but margins.
_ From "An Adult's Happiness Is Quiet," p. 229

On days when your heart feels like hell, on days when everything seems to have failed, let's smile, be grateful, and greet others with even more care. For yourself. To protect your heart. Because that small attitude will be a more powerful signal than any words.
Today I failed. But despite that, I did not collapse.
I am a person who started anew today.
_ From "A Person's Elegance Is Revealed When They Fall Apart," p. 252

Table of Contents

Prologue: When Life Gets Exhausting, Even the Ordinary Becomes a Dream

Chapter 1. Kindness Comes from Physical Strength
Kindness Comes from Physical Strength
Quitting is Courage, Not Quitting is Also Courage
Sensitive People Experience Burnout More Often
Sometimes I Just Want to Give You Unwarranted Praise
When Trump Was Shot, My Stocks Were My First Concern
Survival Means Strength
Not Running Away Is Also a Skill
I Root for Idols More Than My Own Life
We Don't Have the Capacity to Hate So Many Things
Don't Let Your Mood Become Your Personality
I Am a Little Better Than I Think
People with Aching Hearts Are the First to Pretend They Don't Hurt
You're an Adult from the Moment You Start Gifting Yourself
My Wife Labels Happiness Every Morning
A Country Unnecessarily Harsh on Newcomers
Real Psychopaths Aren't in Prison

Chapter 2. Sleeping Well is Also a Skill
Life Can Fail Even When You Do Your Best
If You Don't Laugh, You Won't Be Able to Laugh
I Carry a Luxury Bag and Eat Triangle Gimbap
People's Tone of Voice Has a Temperature
I'm So Depressed I'm Hungry and Sleepy
I Don't Want to Die; I Just Don't Want to Live Like This
What Weapon Will I Have Left When Youth Disappears?
Why Is the Korean Best Effort 110% Instead of 90%?
These Days, Sleeping Well Is Also a Skill
Rude People Introduce Themselves as Honest
I Can Endure Unhappiness, But I Don't Want to Be More Unhappy 'Than You'
Adults Need Adults Too
The Depth of Unhappiness Does Not Prove Desperation
I'm Too Special to Be Defined by MBTI

Chapter 3. I'd Rather Live as a Happy Fool Than a Smart Depressive
I'd Rather Live as a Happy Fool Than a Smart Depressive
Can Effort Be Fairly Rewarded?
The Talent Named Consistency
Some Disadvantages Can Be Turned into Strengths
More Things Aren't Problems Unless You Make Them Problems
Sometimes Indifference Hurts More Than Violence
A Happy Family Is a Symbol of Wealth
Success Is Difficult. Only the Statement That Success Is Easy Is Easy
The Strange Relationship Where You Can Smile Even if You Lose: Family
Wanting to Do Too Well Can Prevent You from Starting Anything
You Can't Feel Jealousy for What You Don't Know
Empathy Also Requires Intelligence
Surprisingly, I'm the Only One Who Wishes My Life Goes Well

Chapter 4. An Adult's Happiness is Quiet
Thirty-Five Isn't a Young Age, Is It?
Sometimes Silent Comfort Comforts Me More
An Adult's Happiness Is Quiet
Cuteness Conquers Everything, Even Stress
Unrecorded Memories Cannot Become Memories
It's Okay to Dislike People
Love Doesn't Offer an Escape, but Everyday Life
A Person's Elegance Is Revealed When They Fall Apart
People Feel Lonely Not When They Are Alone, But When They Are With Others But Still Feel Alone
Getting Old Is Like That, It Smells Even If You Clean It Thoroughly
Senses Need Rest Too
As You Age, Not Having Hobbies Is Sadder Than Not Having Dreams
My Productive Loneliness
Sometimes I Want to Live Today Better Than Tomorrow
A Wise Person Doesn't Easily Become Unhappy

Epilogue: We Are Unnecessarily Unhappy and Overly Complicated in Our Happiness