Fish Have No Feelings: A Story of Loss, Love, and the Hidden Order of Life

Author Lulu Miller · Publisher Gom Publishing · Published 2021-12-17 · ISBN 9791189327156

About the Book

Named one of the best books of 2020 by The Washington Post, Book Riot, National Public Radio (NPR), Chicago Tribune, and Smithsonian!

Even if we don't name them,
there are real things in this world.

“Why Fish Don't Exist” embarks on an unconventional journey, flipping our perceptions about 'what fish (and we) are' within the vast structure of the world. In that moment of losing love and feeling life was over, the author accidentally learned about 'David Starr Jordan,' and, captivated by his fearlessness in confronting chaos, began to trace his life. The author, too, had believed that in this world, "chaos is not a matter of 'if it happens,' but 'when it happens'," and that no one could escape this truth. However, Jordan's story leads readers to an entirely unexpected place, ultimately shocking us into wide-eyed astonishment.
Told in an intimate yet unique style by Lulu Miller, this book is a struggle about science and a story about love, loss, and chaos. Furthermore, it reveals how beliefs can sustain us, and simultaneously how those beliefs can become harmful. As you delve into each of the questions within this book, readers will encounter a deeper, more special secret of life hidden beneath.

Now I found the words to refute my father. “We matter. We matter!” As human beings, we matter to this planet, to this society, and to each other in practical and concrete ways. This statement is not a lie. It's not a flimsy excuse, nor a sin. It was Darwin's belief! Conversely, to only say that we don't matter and to insist on that claim is a lie. It is too gloomy, too rigid, and too short-sighted. To express it with the harshest criticism, it is unscientific. _Page 228

Through the lens of an amazingly interesting science story,
it persistently unearths the hidden order of life.

David Starr Jordan, who served as president of Stanford University, was a 19th-century biologist (taxonomist) who dedicated his life to uncovering how all living creatures, branching out in the form of a vast tree of life, are interconnected. The number of fish he discovered and named himself accounted for almost one-fifth of all known fish species at the time. However, the more he revealed about the hidden tree of life, the more persistently the universe interfered with his work. The countless specimens he collected were destroyed once by a fire caused by lightning, and then the 1906 San Francisco earthquake shattered over a thousand species of fish stored in glass jars, throwing them to the ground. All his accumulated achievements were shattered in an instant.
Most people would have succumbed to despair and given up after such an experience. But what about Jordan? He surveyed the wreckage strewn at his feet, picked up identifiable fish, and began to rebuild his collection. This time, he even introduced an ingenious and innovative method, which he firmly believed would protect his discovered specimens against the chaos of the world.
When author Lulu Miller first heard this anecdote, she thought Jordan was foolish and considered the story a warning about arrogance or denying the order of life. But then, a sudden curiosity about Jordan arose. Perhaps he wasn't reckless, but rather a lesson on how to navigate through adversity and ultimately overcome it. What Miller learned about Jordan's life (which included a suspicious death and a groundbreaking theory that would change the world) completely restructured her own understanding of the universe's order. It was the idea that perhaps salvation could be found in the very things we underestimated.
"Why Fish Don't Exist" offers a prescription for hope that good things await even beyond destruction and loss, enabling readers to examine everything in chaos with curiosity and doubt, to see them more clearly.

If fish don't exist, what else are we wrong about? As a scientist's daughter, it took me a long time to realize this, but when I give up on fish, I realize that science itself is flawed. I realize that science is not a torch illuminating truth, as I had always thought, but a blunt tool that can cause a lot of destruction along the way. _Page 267

A biography, memoir, and scientific adventure, "Why Fish Don't Exist" allows us to look at the world through the lens of science in a completely new way. In particular, the original and elaborate illustrations included in each chapter give the book a mysterious yet grotesque feel, as if holding a 19th-century scientific text.
Also readable as a parable about enduring life in a world where chaos always wins, "Why Fish Don't Exist" will stimulate our thoughts and provide an unforgettable experience of realizing hidden truths about life.

Table of Contents

Prologue

1. The Boy with His Head in the Stars
2. A Prophet of an Island
3. An Interlude Without God
4. Chasing a Tail
5. Origins in a Glass Jar
6. Shattered
7. The Indestructible Thing
8. On Deception
9. The Bitterest Thing in the World
10. The Space of True Terror
11. The Ladder
12. Dandelions
13. Deus ex Machina

Epilogue
A Few Words on the Illustrations
A Few Words on Change
Acknowledgments
Notes